In contrast, some of you respond to rejection more deeply than the average person.
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But, some of you respond better to being refused than others do.
It’s easier for you to separate out who you are, personally, from the rejecting person or circumstance, as you are secure.
Because, no only means no, you don’t feel unlovable, unaccepted, or disrespected.
Of course, you may hurt temporarily, but you do not waste yourself in .
To protect yourself, you have learned to avoid people and situations that put you at risk of refusal. But, you are avoiding the exact experiences that you need to learn how to relate healthily.
Sensitivity to rejection isn’t just a passing fancy of the self-help movement.
It’s a serious symptom of the mood and personality disorders that results in an inability to regulate emotions, exert self-control, and the tendency to give too much personal meaning to life happenings that it undermines the ability to cope with frustrating experiences.
To you, being refused in love, career, or friendship means something is wrong with you.
You have difficulty separating out self-worth and lovability from having a desire or need unreturned.