While I don't want to give up on the Jewish community, I don't want to stay single or marry someone who is much older than me simply because he is a nice Jewish guy.
Leah We'd like to send your letter to rabbis, synagogue presidents and Jewish community leaders throughout North America as a wake-up call.
You are absolutely right -- many Jewish communities are insensitive to the needs of single men and women, who represent 40 percent of Jewish adults in certain geographic areas.
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As a result, we are losing the very people we should be trying to attract.
The good news is that community leaders and rabbis are now realizing that Jewish demographics have changed dramatically over the last 30 years.
They are starting to understand that large numbers of single adults in our midst must have a place in our communities.
I started going to single events sponsored by the local church, because they are much more sensitive to the needs of singles my age.
In fact, I was surprised to see how many Jewish women were at the church singles event.
These were women I knew from Jewish singles events who were going to church events for the same reason as I.
At this point in life, I think that if I am given the choice of having a good, permanent relationship with a man my own age, versus keeping my Judaism, at this point I would choose the man. What are the chances of a woman my age meeting a Jewish man in his early 40s?
I am a 40-year-old woman who has never been married. I no longer attend Jewish events because I feel so isolated from them. Single women are at the bottom of the totem pole, especially those past child-bearing age.
When I was younger I used to meet men through Jewish events and synagogues. I did meet men who wanted to live with me without any commitment, but I always said, "No," because I honestly thought there was someone out there who would commit to me the old-fashioned way. What I find even more depressing is the Jewish community's lack of sensitivity to people my age who are single.