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I feel very disheartened that she has no interest in this faith that is to crucial to my life, and that I don’t even have any friends who share my Catholic faith.It seems that whenever I try to be a good Catholic and Christian I get accused of being a “party pooper” or “holy roller”.I feel down about all this and could use some words of encouragement. But the topic still nagged at me, and after re-reading the email I sent I realized that my advice probably wasn’t going to be that helpful. (who recently had some great thoughts on another subject here and here) had been in this very situation in his own marriage, so I emailed him to ask what he thought.

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😛 Since I am that type of person myself, I do draw so much information, knowledge, and edification from reading, listening to, and devouring the types of books and tapes I’ve often spoken about.

At the beginning, lacking any semblance of humility, and even less insight into the different ways people relate, I clumsily offered book after book, apologetic after apologetic argument, tried to get her to watch EWTN, etc.

All to no avail (except possibly causing a lot of resentment). Paul was right, being unequally yoked is tough, very tough. So I’ll offer what advice and encouragement I can: First, I need to boldly and happily say that there is hope! I honestly could never have envisioned my wife (raised as an atheist) would become a Christian.

It was too good not to share, so with his permission I’m posting his advice in case others may find it helpful.

He writes: Around the time I converted, my wife could also have been described as a mostly content, non-intellectual who just doesn’t really care about faith.

That non-intellectual part is not an insult in the least.

My wife is plenty smart, she just happens to be one of those people who lives more in the real world than in her head (i.e. Sometimes, I really think being an ‘intellectual’ is a huge disadvantage.

A reader emailed me the other day to ask if I had any thoughts on how to discuss faith with an agnostic spouse.

I don’t want to divulge any identifying details, but a rough summary of his question is this: I am a recent convert to Catholicism and my wife is agnostic.

She is content with her life, not really intellectual, and not “searching” spiritually.

So far our marriage is a happy one, but I worry about big conflicts arising from our differing views if we have children.

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